TPB’s Word of the Day

March 31, 2009 at 11:26 am (Word of the Day) (, , , , )

Last week the news reported that tomorrow there’s suppose to be some flesh eating worm virus going around the internet. Oh, like I have time to deal with that…what a pain in my ass. I had to go and make sure all the computers were updated, come by the blog and slather some flesh eating protectant (FEP 45) on it and then send out a herd of pigeons to warn all my family and friends.  Totally sucking up my time from adding to my to-do list then promptly ignoring it, reading blogs, and watching the Trailer Park Boys.

That is all. Off to watch Ricky work on his grade 10 so he can change his “perspectant” on life.

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Trailer Park Boys

March 27, 2009 at 9:17 pm (Monkey Business) ()

Obviously I live under a bigger rock than Patrick Star. How did I not find out about this show until today??? I’m certain I’ve been to every blog on the internet and no one, not one single person has given me a heads up. I had to hear about it at work for Christ’s sakes!

Drill, they’re using a G scale train… guess I better refuckulate one of those engines, hang on to the rest of the cars cuz I’m pretty damn sure I have enough track to reach Canada. 

This is video 1 of 3 for this episode and is so worth 6.5 (really the full 22 or whatever) minutes of your day.

ETA: There appears to be season 8 episode 1 on the YouTube footer. Leave it to me to read the last chapter of a book first.  If you need more TPB I found this link where you can watch the first 7 seasons.

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Exorcising Demons

March 25, 2009 at 9:07 pm (Electronics That Go Bump in the Night, Thought of the Day) (, , , , , )

It just occurred to me that it’s been 1-1/2 years ago today. It almost passed right by me today as I don’t think about it each month like I did the first year.  Let me mark the day with this little ditty.

It was the 25th day of September, that day I’ll always remember…
Mr. Fuckery was a trolling bone, wherever he is will never be home,
and when he died, I was relieved he left us alone.

Perhaps that sounds cruel, disrespectful, whatever. Guess you had to be there.

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It’s a Knick Knack Patty Whack, Give the Frog a Loan

March 24, 2009 at 3:06 pm (Family Foolery) (, , , , )

True Story.

When I was just a wee lass my father like to drink a bit too much. However, times have changed and he hasn’t had nary a drink in over 35 years or so… but that really isn’t the point here.

Sometime in the early 1960s he came home from the tavern and in his drunkenness decided to get all up in my mother’s face and demanded to know what the point was of those fucking knick knacks that sat on the living room shelves. He went on to declare that shelves are for storage and to hold food, not stupid-ass pretties. The next day he came home from work to find all the knick knacks gone and the shelves held pantry goods thoughtfully arranged and on display. Knowing my mother and her wicked sense of humor, I’m surprised she didn’t have them priced with stickers and a grocery cart in the room to get them back to the kitchen.

Now we know why, even when my pantry is full of that shit, she keeps bringing me the huge boxes of fruit roll ups… she obviously has designs on any vacancies in my living room.

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It’s Busted

March 14, 2009 at 9:11 pm (Electronics That Go Bump in the Night, Sassy Saturday) (, , , , , , )

Did I recently get all cocky about how things broke but it could have been worse? Did I mock Murphy or something? It’s been one of those weeks. Here’s what broke:

  1. the gear in my garage door opener
  2. my router
  3. my tonsils
  4. and the mother fuckin’ alien ankle syndrome is back because I thought I would be smart ass and not wear the ankle wrap these past couple of days.

I woke up Tuesday morning and was running a fever of 102 so I called the doc. They could see me at 9:15 so as I was leaving and went to shut the garage door it stopped about 3/4 of the way down. After rescheduling the appointment and getting my neighbor over to get the door down it was determined the gear was worn out. In the past 10 years, one would think, they would have invented metal gears to prevent this sort of tragedy.  And what should be a $2 part is of course a $41 or $59 dollar kit, depending on if the kit is pre-assembled or not. That’s a rant saved for another day.

So I go to bed that night and we lose power. No internet + fever = quickly losing all will to live. I have tonsillitis and can barely swallow let alone talk but I will suffer through it if it means I can rest peacefully knowing the internet is only fingertips away. After spending some time on the phone with cable it is determined that my modem is fine, it’s my router. Cable guy instructs me to call NetGear so I do. NetGear informs me that my warranty has expired but I can buy an extended one or for a one-time fee I can speak to the level 2 (what the fuck is level 2 anyway?) technical department. I ask the NetGear smartypants lady how much for the one-time fee and she tells me $75. I know, don’t laugh, now we know why it’s called level 2. That’s how many levels down their going to stick it to you. 

Screw that! So I go rummaging around the Den of Doom and came out with another router. Keep in mind I’m very feverish so I’m not thinking too clearly and I’m trying to hook this baby up, there’s four ports and I am not that tech savvy. I assume the cat 5 cable goes into the first one but I dunnnnnooo so I call Linksys. That dude gives me the same story as NetGear, minus the level 2 business, and their one-time fee is $29.95. At this point I may or may not have had a bit of a breakdown cuz he decides to help a sista out.  Well we didn’t get it working so I hooked the cable modem up directly to the kids computer and I swear I am not pilfering my neighbors wifi for my laptop until I have time to revisit this issue in the next few days.

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Breaking Bad

March 7, 2009 at 11:50 pm (Monkey Business) ()

The season premier is tomorrow night!

For J. Drill, here’s the link to watch the pilot episode of last season.

Breaking Bad on AMC 

To read up on the other episodes go here:  Episode Recaps

Enjoy.

PS. I’m a bit late but… WOLVERINES!

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Sassy Saturday

March 7, 2009 at 10:30 pm (Sassy Saturday) (, , , , , , , , , )

It’s Saturday night, booyahshaka!

This week has consisted of skillfully advancing my Guitar Hero career, mourning the imminent demise of my coffee pot, continued clearing of the Den of Doom, estimating the value of found doohickeys and thingamajigs, selling a Life’s Work on eBay, and eagerly awaiting the arrival of Grilling Season which officially kicks off tomorrow.

There were a couple of winters where I grilled year ’round but then I said fuck it. It’s just too much hassle, the light is on the opposite side of the deck from my grill and that meant using a battery powered lantern, it’s too damn cold here in the northern tundra and lastly, Official Grilling Season is fun to say and gives me something to look forward to.

Speaking of my Guitar Hero career, I wonder if they’ve come up with a piano version yet cuz if they have or do I would totally kick ass on that. It finally occurred to me this week that I should see if the Wii would run through my sound system so I could have my full on Midori rock-girl experience when I play. After my blonde moment had passed I remembered all I had to do was change the receiver to Video 2 and now arena, hall, live, or whatever mode I want it to sound like is just a button away. Oh yeah, sassy Poison Live! God I’m easily entertained.

Happy Official Grilling Season!

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