My Closet is a Scary Place

October 26, 2009 at 8:07 pm (Monkey Business, Polls) (, , , , )

After conferring with my magic 8 ball tonight, it assured me I would be going on a date soon. It’s been a while since I had one and I want to make sure I am dressed for the kill.  Though I have been compared to the likes of June Cleaver I’m thinking I need to leave the pearls and apron at home. Not wanting to appear as a desperate slut either I think I should probably save the leather and cat o’ nine tails for a more appropriate venue. Without those two options I have a serious wardrobe dilemma. 

I have sparkly cinderella shoes, a fox stole, miscellaneous “damn your ass looks good in those” jeans, flip flops with bunnies on them, some workout clothes that I’ve never actually worked out in, and some killer gladiator shoes that I can’t wear because it’s too cold. This is quickly becoming a sad turn of events.

However, a few minutes ago I was standing in my closet thinking that surely there must be something in here that would be date acceptable and then it occurred to me that hidden, in a very special secret place that has yet to be determined, I have a stashed outfit. If I remember correctly, I last wore this outfit in Nineteen Hundred and Ninety One and it totally kicks ass. There are black stirrup pants, a leopard jacket with black knit sleeves, 4″ heels that are striped cloth from the 1940s, cat-eye glasses… with rhinestones!, and some totally awesome garish jewelry.

So kids, what’s it going to be… jeans, fox stole and bunny flip flops or leopard jacket and cat-eye glasses? I report, you decide.

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2 Comments

  1. J Drill said,

    My vote is for the tards and cat glasses. How come you never wear that outfit when we go out? lmao.

    • Poison said,

      Well I found the jacket but sadly have not been able to locate the glasses, shoes or jewelry. Haven’t decided if I’m dressing up tomorrow but if I do I am going to be a leopard, I have the purrtfect color fiber to put in my hair with pins to make it all cat like.

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