Poof into the night

July 2, 2010 at 3:34 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , )

So my buddy is gone, no sign of him or his new blog. Frankly, I’m a bit worried, I even left a comment on his FB but still no response to me or anyone.  If the new blog was still there I would just assume it meant he is MIA on an assignment again.

So Mr. Talker, if you read this please leave a comment, shoot me an email, something to let me know you’re okay. Total silence is beginning to freak me out.

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What are you doing Friday night at 8 pm?

June 4, 2009 at 5:13 pm (Uncategorized)

Ms. Bloggess recommends going down tomorrow night so go read this then quickly pass the link around so that I can have the internet all to myself for a few minutes.

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February 24, 2009 at 4:52 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , )

Life has been an absolute bitch lately and it’s been making Poison cranky and an unproductive blogger. Even though I should have focused elsewhere today, I decided I really needed to take the time and finally start clearing out the Den of Doom, it’s been way beyond an acceptable time frame and weighs heavily on me.  I can’t believe how much shit I’ve already thrown out and even though this will be a longer process than I would like, at least it’s started and that feels pretty damn good.

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Dead Kitten Mittens

January 18, 2009 at 9:27 pm (Uncategorized)

If you don’t read The Bloggess and you’re sick of reading cat posts, then you must read this post: I’m like the Thomas Edison of inventions that use dead cats. The comments are worthy too.

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VW Beetle Tale #1

January 18, 2009 at 8:17 pm (Uncategorized)

So once, when in college, my BF (hereafter referred to as J. Drill) and I went out for the evening. It’s the late 70s and things were so very different then. It was before the minivan, the VCR, and stickers on your license plate. We’re in school, broke-ass poor and could barely afford gas for the car let alone license plates and all that other legal shit. So J. Drill decided that since the plates were expired that if she perhaps put a yellow piece of paper, with some scribbling on it, in right side of the window it would appear she had renewed her plates and was just waiting for them to arrive. Don’t laugh, it worked for some time… until…

So we’re on our way out, it’s bitter cold, and we’re cruising along when we see an acquaintance walking. We stopped and asked him if he needed a lift, “sure, thanks!” Dude hops in the back seat and pulls a beer out of his coat. No problem, everyone rode around drinking in cars back then.

About a block later, while turning a corner, we see red flashing. Fuck! If I remember correctly one of us at least had the foresight to rip the fake registration out of the window.

“Miss, can I see your driver’s license? Did you know that your plates are expired? Do you have a registration for your vehicle? Is there anything legal about this vehicle?”  No, he didn’t ask that and I don’t believe asked about insurance either cuz we’d be all like, “Are you fucking kidding me?”

Meanwhile, drunk ass, open-sealed motherfucker in the back seat is rambling on about something like “fuckin’ pigs man.” The situation could have only improved if he had lit a spliff. I think we somehow managed to shut him up and conceal the beer before the cop walked back up to the car. It’s all a bit fuzzy to me as I’m sure I suffered a bit of the vapors from it all.

The officer walked back up to the car and said, “Miss, since you live nearby I will follow you home so you can park your vehicle until it’s properly licensed.”  Breathing a sigh of relief J. Drill just said something like, “thank you, I will get it done tomorrow” (yeah, sure we would).

We got back to our apartment and instead of going upstairs to ours we went downstairs to our friend Ray’s place. J. Drill asked Ray, “Ray, get your new plates yet?” (Back then there was a lag of time there where both plate were legal.) He said yes and she told him, “Good, the pigs just busted me for mine being expired and Poison and I are going out.  Can I borrow your old ones so my car appears legal?”  “Sure, have fun, tootaloo!” And off we went.

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